My Christmas List

I made it really easy for Bub this year. I just printed off a list of books from my GoodReads TBR list and gave it to him… but I was sure to highlight the ones I wanted the most. They were:

Fallen by Lauren Kate

Shiver by Maggie Stiefvater

Hush, Hush by Becca Fitzpatrick

Apparently it’s a paranormal YA Christmas for me! I can’t wait to spend Boxing Day reading. I hope to get a couple books done over the holidays.

What I really wanted Santa to bring me, but I didn’t even ask for was:

a Wii with the new Super Mario Bros game. A girl can dream right? We’re cutting back this Christmas so I didn’t even ask for it because I knew Bub would either buy it or feel bad all day that he didn’t. Besides… I would probably fail out of University because I’d zombie out and play Mario 24/7.

The only other thing I asked for was a skin for my BlackBerry since it’s starting to get a little beat-up.

I do know that I am getting a KATHY BAG (squeeeeeee!!!!) from my Dad and step-mom. She found them in a store there, sent me online to figure out which one I liked and told me that I was getting it. I’ve wanted one since May when I saw it in Florida, didn’t buy it, and have been kicking myself since because it’s way more expensive here.

Look how pretty!!!!

I still have to finish shopping for Bub. I know what I need/want to get, I just have to do it. I’ll finish either tomorrow night or this weekend. Then I have to get wrapping!!!!

I so LOVE Christmas!!!!

Crazy (Wicked) Christmas

Oh sweet relief… and even sweeter sleep. I wrote my last exam of the term yesterday and I now have 3ish weeks off before classes start again.

The exam didn’t go well. I just can’t wrap my head around microeconomics. I made it through the first two tests and worked my butt of to get really good marks (I went into the exam with an 83) but no matter how much I tried to study the new material for the exam I couldn’t get it. I studied Saturday afternoon, all day (11 hours) on Sunday and 5 hours yesterday morning and I still felt totally unprepared going in to the exam. If I did well… it’s pure luck from good guessing. I hate that feeling. I’m a straight A student so I’m not used to it.

I’m excited to not have to studying anymore of course, but I’m most excited to now get to really kick-off and enjoy my Christmas season. This is my FAVORITE time of year for sure. Tonight I’m going to go home after work, plug the tree and the other lights, put some Christmas music on and make my garlicky and tortellini soup. Then, we’re going to watch some of the Christmas specials I have waiting on the PVR. I can’t decide what to watch first. Here are some of my favorites:

TV Specials:

Santa Claus is Coming to Town

Garfield Christmas (which hasn’t been on in years-boo!)

Charlie Brown Christmas

Movies:

The Polar Express

A Mom for Christmas

The Family Stone

A Christmas Carol (original 50’s version)

I love them all, but those are the must-sees. So tonight I’m taking it easy and then the craziness begins.

Tomorrow night- MIL is coming over for her b-day dinner (I’m doing slow-cooker roast because it’s just so yummy and easy)

Thursday- get my shopping done.

Friday- I’m heading out on the town with a group of girls to celebrate the end of the semester.

Saturday -FIL’s 50th b-day party and drinks for a friend’s b-day if 50th wraps up early enough.

Sunday- hopefully nothing. Christmas related loveliness (music, movies, specials etc)

Monday- wrapping while Bub works late.

Tuesday- BFF’s and the “men” in their lives are coming for a holiday dinner at my place (by men, I mean- 1 is bringing her husband and the other is bringing her son).

Wednesday- finish wrapping/tentative reschedule date in case the weather is bad on the Tuesday.

Christmas Eve (Thursday)- break from work begins… dinner at FIL’s.

Christmas Day- morning with just us (Bub, me and the dogs) Dinner at my Mum’s.

Boxing Day- Bub works at 5am (oh the joys of retail) and then dinner at MIL’s.

And then we may or may not see my Dad and step-mom between the holidays. They were going to come but are not 100% sure now.
Phew! It’s going to be a crazy couple of weeks and I’m excited about every little part of it!!! I <3 Christmas and all the craziness that comes with it.

Whiney Pants

Perhaps I’m not cut out for this. Perhaps this was a mistake. And now, because I’ve shot my ever-loving mouth off to everyone I know about how freakin’ excited I am to FINALLY go back to school, I’m stuck. Stuck for the next 4 years minimum (through the summers and all) doing something that I really dislike and resent. Brilliant Ashley, just friggin’ brilliant.


I miss my old life. I didn’t realize how amazing it was to be able to go home every night right after work and be able to live my life. To sit and have a long dinner with my husband , to take a walk, to get my waxing done whenever I felt like it, to READ my own books, to exercise, to be able to leave the stressful responsibility at the office until the next morning and just go be me for the rest of the day. I knew the school was going to be crazy, but I had no idea just how crazy it would be. Seriously… every little thing we need/want to do has to be planned out now. There’s no more spontaneity, and really, very little personal life at all.

I live, eat, breathe and sleep school. Yes- I sleep school…. literally. I wake up almost every morning now from a dream that was related to school or thinking about the information I studied the night before. It’s awful. There is constantly something school related hanging over my head…. some upcoming test or assignment that I should be working on, or a reading that I should be doing. Ugh!

I’ve taken on too much and I realize that now. Three courses per term on-top of the commute and my regular Monday to Friday full-time job is just too much for one person. The classes themselves are fine, but it’s when all the assignments and tests start coming up around the same time that it starts to get really overwhelming. But, now that I’ve started it, I think I have to keep going at this pace. If not, I’ll be in school forever and I just want to get it over with. Even at my current pace (9 credits per fall and winter term and 6 per summer term) I won’t finish until December of 2013 (yes, that’s right. In just 4 short years from today I’ll be preparing to write my final exams to complete my degree).

I’m conflicted because I still need/want my degree more than anything, but I’m just wishing that I had done it sooner.

I have options to get out faster:

1. Settle for the Bachelor of Administrative Studies- drop the “honours” part. This gets me out a year earlier, but I forfeit being able to say I have a BAS- Specialized Honours- Management

2. Hope and pray that Bub finds a new job soon that will allow me drop down to working part-time so I can study with a full course load (5 courses per semester). This is the one I am holding the most hope for, but at this point it doesn’t seem likely since I’m the major breadwinner.

I really can’t believe I’m complaining about this. I remember this time last year, when I had no idea that I’d be returning to school, telling my BFF “I’d give anything to go back to school- I really miss it”. HA! Joke’s on you Ashley. You don’t realize how much you settle into adult life after school and forget how hard it is to be a student and constantly be working on deadlines and marks and stress. Studying for exams sucks, writing papers about crap you don’t care about sucks, saving for books and tuition sucks, spending all your non-working and non-class free time doing some kind of assignment…REALLY SUCKS!

I miss feeling like a grown-up and having a life. I miss my husband, my books, my dogs, exercise... money and I needed to whine about it.

Thank GOD I only have 6 more days until exams are over and I have a little break. I just have to suck it up for the next 6 days (oh… and the next four years too).

9 Years

Today is the 9th anniversary of that day that Brad and I started "officially and exclusively" seeing each other. We had been dating since Halloween, I guess as much as you can "date" in high school, but it was December 7th 2000 that we had "the" conversation.

For our first official date, we went to see The Grinch (Jim Carrey version) at the movie theatre and then we had dinner a Burger King. I was 15 and he was 16 years old. Neither of us drove (he had his G1, but that means you need a G driver in the car with you) so we took the bus. I can tell you that we were extremely happy when he got his G2 later that winter so we could finally drive to our dates and to school etc. He came over to my house every single night after school.... and we've pretty much been inseparable for the nine years since then. We rarely do things separately, even down to the grocery shopping and house work. Because we went to elementary school and high school together, and then worked together for a couple of years, we have mostly mutual friends. The best man in our wedding is someone we both consider to be one of our best friends, separately and together.

We broke-up a couple times in high school, but it only lasted a day or two and we would be back together. We went to semi-formal together, I was his date for his prom and he was my date at mine. I saw him graduate high school (the year before I did) and then he same me graduate too. In grade 12, he was in college, but still often came to the school to take me for lunch, or pick me up and drive me home/to work.
We were together through college (although we were at different schools) and within a month of my college graduation we were engaged... and a year later we were married.

I was with him when his parents separated, when he wasn't speaking to his father or his father fiancé, when his brother was arrested and sent to jail (twice),when his aunt who is basically a second mother to him was diagnosed with breast cancer, and when his (and now our) niece was born. He was with me through the extremely turbulent times with my mom and step-dad as we tried to reform a relationship after a long separation, he was with me through my lay-off 3 months before our wedding, and he was with me through the turbulence that followed with my step-dad once again. We were together when we each got our drivers licenses; we bought our first vehicles together, moved out of our parent's houses for the first time together... and on and on and on.

We've grown up together in every sense of the word. After 9 years with the same person, you know each other better than anyone else in the world and you've been through lots of good times and lots of bad times. And although it's hard to believe that it's already been almost a decade together, it's also difficult to remember a time where we weren't together; where he wasn't the first person I needed to call when something good, bad or hilarious happens. I really cannot imagine what I would do without him. As much as he drives me crazy a lot of the time, he is my support system and keeps me going.

I think after 9 years I've decided that I kinda like him, and I think I'll keep him.

Christmas Kick-Off

1 exam down, 2 to go.

It went well. I’m happy with it, but I do know that I shouldn’t be overly confident since there is always the chance that I didn’t interpret the questions properly, or include enough detail or….. blah blah blah. It was 5 short answer questions (identifying the significance of several key terms from the course material) and 1 essay question. I kind of panicked when I saw the key terms, but it’s amazing how, once you get writing, lots and of little details, probably worth some marks, start coming back to you. The essay I wrote was on the spread of religion and culture through Ancient Greece, Classical Rome and Europe of the Middle Ages. I know, BORING!! Whatever… I have an interest in world religions and their origins so it was information that stuck in my mind. 

What's funny is that I literally felt all the inforamion I had studied leave my brain, like a balloon deflating, as I left the exam.  I really think that if I had to go and write it again today, I wouldn't know 1/2 what I did yesterday.  It's just... gone.

I don’t have another exam until next Thursday. I plan to start studying on Sunday, but will cram most of it into the evenings next week. I need as much rest as possible this weekend since my economics exam is next Monday, is going to be a doozie, and will require an entire weekend of non-stop studying.

For better or for worse… as of 5pm on the 14th it will all be over for this term. 1 term down, 4 bazillion to go.

I’m so stoked for this weekend. It’s my official kick-off to Christmas. I have a few errands to run after work, but then I’m heading home and staying there. I plan to get all (and I mean ALL) of my cleaning done tonight and then Bub and I are making Chicken Caesars for dinner and parking it to watch some TV. I’m going to try to take the girls for a walk and read a bit as well. My stack of library books has not decreased.

Tomorrow is one of my favorite days of the year. Christmas kick-off. It’s the day we blast some Christmas music (YAY), decorate the house (YAY), possibly do some Christmas baking (YAY), try to get some Christmas shopping done (YAY), make a yummy dinner and eat picnic style in front of the fire (YAY) and watch some kind of Christmas movie (YAY)!!! Can you tell that I LOVE Christmas? I may see if Bub wants to take a walk to look at some Christmas lights too.

Now, I’m just hoping that we get some snow so that it really feels like Christmas. I love this time of year.

And exams begin...

I sat through my last microeconomics lecture last night!!!! But... this of course means the beginning of exams.

Tonight- HUMA exam: Level of preparedness- 60%/ Nerve Level- flips between a 1 and a 10

This is a 2 hour exam with short answer and essay questions for 20% of my mark. I'm trying to cram a little review in (how bad is that at work?) but I’m as prepared as I’m going to get. I simply can’t cram any more information into my brain for this class. I just have to review as much as I can and do my best. I guarantee that all the info will be released from my brain like air from a balloon as soon as I walk out of the exam tonight.

Next Thursday- ADMS exam

This will be a 3 hour exam with case study and essay questions for 55% of my mark. I’m really not worried about this one. It’s only on 5 or 6 chapter’s worth of stuff and I have lots of time to study. I hope that it doesn’t take me by surprise as an extremely difficult exam, but I’ll be as ready for it as I possibly can.

The Following Monday- ECON exam

This will be a 3 hour exam of multiple choice questions worth 50% of my mark. I’m going in to the test an 84%, but only because of an insane amount of studying for the first two tests. To tell the truth, I’m terrified for this exam and the amount of studying I will have to do for it in the 2 days I’ll have been it and the ADMS exam that’s just before it. I’ll be so happy when it’s over.

And that’s it! By 5pm on Monday the 14th, I’ll be done exams and have 3 weeks off from all things school related. I can’t tell you how excited I am for this. I need a break desperately (and that need will be even worse by the 14th) and I want to enjoy the Christmas season… which is my favorite time of year!!!

Okay… enough procrastinating. I have work and reviewing to do. See you on the flip side.

The Joy of Food

I have reignited my love affair with food. This is not a good thing, but I can't help it. I cannot stop eating. I'm hungry basically all the time and I'm never satisfied. Even when I can feel myself getting physically full, I still want more. It's soooo bad. I'm terrified that I'm going to slip back to my old weight when I've worked so hard to get it off... I can't let that happen. What doesn't help is that I have no time or motivation to exercise. I miss running, I miss walking every night with Bub and the dogs.... I miss it. I just don't have time now.
And the holiday season sure doesn't help. We went to a Christmas party on Saturday.... and the food.... OH the food. Breads and dips, meatballs, cheese and cracker platters, mini quiches, sausage rolls, spring rolls, veggies and dip.... and the desserts! Oi Vey! Platters of cookies and squares and cakes etc. including two of my ultimate favorites (and weaknesses) no bake cherry cheesecake and nanimo bars. So, so, so good. Combine all of that with the alcohol and I probably exceeded my calorie limit for the week in the course of a few hours.
Sunday was not great either. Bub and I shared a large (yes... a LARGE) popcorn at the movies and then, after my super healthy dinner of salmon, brown rice, salad and turnip... I topped it off with TWO bowls of PC Candycane and Fudge Crackle ice cream. I couldn't help myself. It's delish and I can only get it this time of year.
I haven't weighed myself, and my clothes are all still too big... so that's a good sign, but it won't last for long. Why is it that its food that causes weight gain? Why can't it be something like smoking or swearing or.... not enough sex? Just something that would be easier to give up or do more of? I love food, I love to eat and I HATE that I feel guilty for every little thing that goes in my mouth.
The scariest part is... we're just getting started with the Christmas season. I'm sure there will be much more overeating to come.